1. |
||||
living inside the shell of puberty
trapped in a hell that we all see
that we all see
you cut your friends daily just to see them bleed
no longer a house and more an autoclave
more an autoclave
always a friendly, soaking, bloodied mess
sterile feelings replace happiness
in place of happiness
the people you hate will find each other
cut off the left breast of yr mother
yr mother
we eat through ourselves, striking the skin from bone
we live in a rock that calls itself our home
desperately avoiding any change
i called out for you, now just a fading cross
when we are together we are forever lost
anxiously awaiting a quick end
|
||||
2. |
dopamine supplements
02:46
|
|||
dopamine supplements
trick myself into feeling
a guy i hate is here
i want him to love me
misery is tangible
and comfortable
fuck god, stay high
and love urself
a void inside a bowl of blood
has got me thinking
that angels haven't fucked enough
to start feeling
a guy i love is here
i want him to hurt me
dopamine supplements
to keep me happy
desperately searching
for the pills that help me sleep
pray i never find them
the pills that help me sleep
|
||||
3. |
getting into jpop
00:50
|
|||
4. |
holy cross made of flesh
03:29
|
|||
drape your broken symmetry
over the hills that made you bleed
rather than your broken family
there already sick to death of you
idols on your mantelpiece
jesus loves to see you scream
depression always made you feel
much happier than bliss
flowers burn up in your room
angels dance across your bed
weed has never made you high
you only us it to pass the time
read the writing on the wall
of a piss covered bathroom stall
public toilet poetry
each word drips across your mind
eat the love that keeps you strong
you never needed anyone
so why does loneliness
care anything for you
haven't seen your friends in days
you don't need them anyway
holy cross made of flesh
make friends with guys that make you sick
laughing gas for the pain
klonopin tries to keep you sane
danny loves to see your face
so does mom and dad
virgin blood smears your cheeks
masturbate to feel release
fetishize innocence
holy cross made of flesh
|
||||
5. |
i'll be cool in heaven
02:21
|
|||
part time work was never that kind to me
blackened wet streets, disappear dry saint, hurried phone calls home
licking ghosts and sucking death
darkness was my only friend until you turned the light on
eat meat that never goes off, street lights never turn off
in towns that fuck at night, deep sleep crystallise my faith
drip wax on ashen skin, i'll be cool in heaven
ascend with people that love my music but will never know my name
I'd love to let it end
cause i'll be cool in heaven
|
||||
6. |
||||
the dregs of a beautiful demon
the last breath of an aphid, final poem on earth, the son of a nurse
the bodies of conceivable alibis
incomparable sins, slice open an eye, deep rooted suicide
honied ash spilling, dripping and useless
crush the bones of a cloud, blue sky melting translucent, glowing plastic pain
dregs of a beautiful demon
wrap your arms up in veins, trapped by the blood of the one you loved
|
||||
7. |
i hope you thrive
01:00
|
|||
8. |
i want to be 15 forever
05:31
|
|||
Talking about school with you
High in your parents house
What will we make of ourselves
You ask through the smoke in your mouth
Your parents were still together then
And you still wanted to be with me
"i want to be 15 forever" you'd say
"i want them to see what we see"
"Each and every person we know will pack up and leave
But never me and you"
"i want to be 15 forever" you say
While I reply in unison
|
||||
9. |
||||
east wide moor, don't stop, keep going
till i'm dead
grab a bench, feel anxious
at yr child's funeral
eat yrself, keep going, keep going (keepgoingkeepgoingkeepgoingkeepgoingkeepgoingkeepgoingkeepgoing)
and move on
enter a door without a handle
become wooden, stiff and angry
we never ended and never will
i'll love you when it's over
i'll love you when we're older
slow down time and watch all deaths
end at once
not asleep, drop pills
touch anything at all
eternity is where
you'll forget about this place
destiny isn't
quite what you think
disparate and frail without answers
a lively disposition
bright lights, new friends, dark eyes
apocalypse is yawning
pseudo nightcalls, abyss
the end of life is boring
sympathy lays wasted on the floor of your dads apartment
he never said he'd love you
nobody said they'd love you
|
||||
10. |
martha
03:44
|
|||
11. |
boredom
03:05
|
|||
take off your clothes and wash yourself of the boredom, the boredom of life ending
watch all eternities flail and end at once
eat at a table made by friends you haven't touched in a long time
dope black, blue and aching, the transcendental youth are coming for you
drip puberty on the curtains your mother left you, they never pulled the room together anyway
torture their memories, scream until they're laughing
why won't they ever stop laughing
it never stopped hurting
|
||||
12. |
||||
poking at eyeballs that have long since gone. ripping up pictures that your daughters have drawn. you would later claim to have gone coke blind. you would later claim to have touched god. large asphalt parking lots, painted white lines like maps to salvation. you never saw cars there, only people lost like you. your constant ticks made it difficult to talk. you stopped eating when you turned 24. cans of paint line the walls of your home, well not your home but the place where you can sleep. drinking never made you feel like this, it just made you angry. a cross around your neck, some pills for the pain. the holocene extinction had begun
eat the bones that make you sick, i haven't seen you give up yet.
love is the sixth extinction, hate is a large part of life
love is something we will know
|
||||
13. |
break and become
02:19
|
|||
slipping forward
vomit stains reeling
watch as i break and become the trees
|
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